Spun by Catherine McKenzie

Author:Catherine McKenzie [McKenzie, Catherine]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781443436472
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2014-10-15T00:00:00+00:00

I’ve been following Bernard’s plan. I get up every day and work out with my trainer and eat a bland breakfast and take my vitamins. I haven’t had a blow out in a week, though I did have to buy new clothes—purchased for me by Bernard’s assistant—because nothing in my wardrobe was tame enough for him. None of my new clothes fit me properly, and I’ve gained three pounds. I’m starting to look healthy, which had better stop pretty soon if I ever want to get cast in anything again.

I’ve also been volunteering at the local actors’ studio, giving lessons to kids who can’t afford to pay for the program, and I’ve been to seven meetings in seven days. I’ve also had seven remember-that-time-when-blah-blah-blah lunches and have turned out my light at 10 p.m. on the dot seven nights in a row. I’ve read three books and twenty scripts, and I’ve never been so bored in my entire life.

It hasn’t all gone according to plan. The acting classes were met in the press with complete derision—Who does she think she is, teaching other people to act? She shouldn’t be allowed near children! etc., etc.—my Oscar nomination for Northanger Abbey long forgotten. And though I check each morning, counting carefully, the number of people waiting outside my door has not diminished.

The prevailing sentiment seems to be: How long can she keep this up? And: We clearly need to be there when she loses it. And also: She’s obviously pregnant. Why else would she be treating herself so well?

But buried in among all the negativity there’s also this: Is she turning over a new leaf? And this: I’ve always been rooting for her! And also: We’re so proud of her! (This last one might have been written by the head of the Amber Sheppard Fan Club, who’s kind of been semi-stalking me for most of my life. But hey, I’ll take it.)

It all might’ve worked eventually. If I could’ve stood it, if I could’ve kept it up.

But then something happens that brings it all crashing down.

Danny goes on Cathy Keeler.

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